Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be happy with what you have.

Today, I read this quote by Doris Mortman in my daily reading of Simple Abundance by Sarah Ban Breathnach.

I have to admit that I don’t always keep up with the readings each day but I am determined to complete every one of them by the end of 2013!

Making peace with who I am has been a difficult process for me.  I always thought that I should be more disciplined, a harder worker, better at keeping a clean, tidy house, make more money and create happiness for everyone around me!  Now that I have connected with my strengths, my passion and my purpose, I still wonder…..

Is who I am enough?

In Lesson 186 of A Course in Miracles it says,

What is given us to do, we have the strength to do.  Our minds are suited perfectly to take the part assigned to us by One Who knows us well.

Yes, I AM everything that I need!

Proactively Positive!

If we’re interested in creating miracles, in invoking the most powerful creative manifestation, we must proactively be positive. There are three types of positive attitude that make all the difference: positivity about other people, positivity about possibility, and positivity about ourselves. Marianne Williamson

What positive thoughts can I have about other people today?  Gratitude for their presence in my life and the influence they have on my success.  Love for who they are.

How can I think positively about what is not yet?  It is called faith.  Marianne loves to talk about the words of the Fairy Godmother in the Cinderella fairy tale.

I wouldn’t have come if you weren’t expecting me.

The bible verse “love thy neighbor as thyself” means that you must first love yourself in order to know how to effectively love your neighbor!

Plan ahead – it wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.

Plan your work and work your plan!

Brian Tracy, in his book Eat That Frog strongly suggests that you plan every day in advance.  This habit allows you to create your life rather than live at the effect of life.  When you look at the list of  tasks, appointments and problem solving assignments you can feel completely overwhelmed.  Plan as best you can the night before.

Then……….clear your mind before you go to bed knowing that you have planned your work.

The most important “planning” goes on while you are sleeping.

“In a dream, a vision of the night,
When sound sleep falls on men,
While they slumber in their beds,

Then He opens the ears of men,
And seals their instruction, Job 33: 15-16

When you wake up in the morning review your “plan” and see if it still resonates with the new thoughts and ideas you acquired during the night!

The Divinely Proportioned Life

I love to think about the Divine Proportion .  

Phi In Art, Nature, and Science

The Divine Proportion is known by many names. Golden Mean, Sacred Cut and Phi are only a few; and it is not by chance that the Divine Proportion was given its name. It has been called divine because over thousands of years it has been deemed to be so.

Beginning with calculations found on clay tablets in ancient Babylon, the story of Divine Proportion can be traced alongside the history of numbers to the fractals of the digital age. As its many forms unfold we uncover the Golden Rectangle in the Parthenon, Golden Spirals in the human inner ear, a Golden Angle in the petal patterns of a rose, and the Fibonacci numbers in lilies, daisies, pineapples, and in our own DNA.

With its natural balance and elegant beauty, the Divine Proportion is a perpetual reminder that our hope for regeneration and continuity lies in realizing the meaningful and harmonious relationship of all the parts to the whole.

Published by Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.
ISBN: 1-4027-3522-7

Designed by Michael Zipkin
Cover by Amy Ray

How can we apply this principle of a 2/3 to 1/3  ratio to bring natural balance back to our lives.

  1. We live in a 24 hour day cycle.  Applying the Divine Proportion  would mean that on average, 16 hours are for activity and 8 hours of those 24 hours are for rest.
  2. Throughout a calendar year, 243 days are for activity and 122 days are for rest.  Take 104  days to rest (really rest!) on the weekend. Now you have 18 weekdays of vacation still to use.

So how can we expect to feel good and in tune with our environment when we consistently swim upstream in conflict with the natural cycles of our Universe? Are we expecting to sandwich in a lifetime of work between ages 20-60 before we rest in retirement?  What if we balanced our life throughout our life and not retire?

What can men learn about women from how they use computers?

Everyone has learned by now that women experts at multitasking.  There is a great section of the TED video by Ken Robinson (14 minutes in) about the difference between men and women.  He describes a woman in the kitchen preparing dinner,  helping kids with their homework,  managing a load of laundry and talking on the phone for work all at the same time.  He then characterizes the man as saying,

“Everybody out of the kitchen,  can’t you see I’m trying to fry and egg  in here!”

Enough said.  In his book, For Men Only – a straightforward guide to the inner lives of women,  co-authored by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn,  Jeff shares this insight.  When a man works on the computer,  more than likely, he has one window open at a time and when he is finished with it, he closes it.

I described what many women had told me: that their thought lives were almost like busy computers with multiple windows open and running all at once, unwanted pop-ups intruding all the time, and little ability to close out or ignore any of that mental or emotional activity until a more convenient time.

He goes on to share this analogy which encourages an empathetic response to our gender differences.

If all men are truly visual and can’t help it, then I think they should please understand that women are truly verbal and can’t help it.  For example, the things men say to us are in mental tape archives and are as real today as they were the moment they were spoken.

How can you help her close all of these open windows because she cannot relax and give you her attention until she does? She is a high-level project manager. When she asks you, or anyone in the vicinity to do something,  she is waiting for it to get done so she can check it off her list.  She can’t rest until the project is complete.

How can you honor the way her mind works?

Ask questions about the open windows.

Listen.

Validate.

Do what it takes to close the open windows that require closing.

What is the work you need to rest from?

How do you define work?

  1. Any activity that leads to income.
  2. Any activity that is on a to-do list.
  3. Any activity that is not done for pleasure.
  4. Any activity………………

Notice that the word activity or action is associated with anything we do that is considered work.

We usually define rest as R & R,  rest and relaxation.  How many of these items are really rest and how many are really relaxation?

  1. Reading a book
  2. Watching TV
  3. Eating
  4. Exercising
  5. Engaging in a sport.
  6. Travel
  7. Sleeping
  8. Meditating
  9. Being in a state of silence and solitude.
  10. Fasting

Numbers 1-6 are really relaxation.  Numbers 7-10 could be rest if you are meditating without an agenda,  if you are sleeping in a deep state,  if your mind is as quiet as your surroundings.

Are we afraid of resting?

Change the vibrational energy of your financial transactions!

I learned something very important yesterday from my friend Jamie Snyder of the MEK Group about the velocity of money.

The most important variable that mediates the effects of changes in the money supply is the velocity of money. Imagine that you purchase a hamburger. The waiter then takes the money that you spent and uses it to pay for his dry cleaning. The dry cleaner then takes that money and pays to have his car washed. This process continues until the bill is eventually taken out of circulation. In many cases, bills are not removed from circulation until many decades of service. In the end, a single bill will have facilitated many times its face value in purchases.

Velocity of money is defined simply as the rate at which money changes hands. If velocity is high, money is changing hands quickly, and a relatively small money supply can fund a relatively large amount of purchases. On the other hand, if velocity is low, then money is changing hands slowly, and it takes a much larger money supply to fund the same number of purchases.  SparkNotes

What I am worried about is that there are a defined number of pieces of the money pie and I don’t have the sized piece I want and need.  Money is moving at a higher velocity out of my bank account than it is going in!   I’m worried about money;  the cost of health care,  the cost of repairs to my home and car,  the cost of living beyond my years of work,  the cost of caring for my children,  the cost of political decisions.  How can I possibly release that fear of not having what I need? The fear surrounding money is the real issue!

So what is today’s challenge?  Take an entire day and not worry!   Are you crazy,  if I don’t worry about it,  everything will fall apart.  The reality,  worry does not add anything to your life or the lives of others.  Caution,  advance planning,  foresight, yes……..worry, no!

If I understand the velocity of money concept correctly,  a smaller amount of money circulating more quickly can fund a larger amount of transactions.  Is this a new take on the fishes and loaves story of the Bible?

If money is energy,  then the rapid flow of a small portion high-vibrational energy  will have a greater impact on the world than a huge amount of low-vibrational energy.  What would you categorize as a high-vibrational transaction.  A thoughtfully prepared meal of fresh healthy foods eaten in a pleasant atmosphere is going to infuse your body with higher vibrational energy than the fast food meal eaten in your car.  Donating money, goods or services is going to be a higher-vibrational exchange than  giving your time and talent to a job that is not rewarding.

Choose high-vibrational energy transactions today.  See how you feel!

On my desk, written on a 5×8 index card is this prayer written by Marianne Williamson

Dear God,

I surrender to you all my thoughts about money.

I surrender to you all my debts.

I surrender to you all my wealth.

Open my mind to receive abundantly.

Channel your abundance through me in a way that serves the world.

Amen.

“In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun, and – SNAP! – the job’s a game!” – Mary Poppins

Brain Tracy, in his book Eat That Frog, talks about creative procrastination;  the ability to look at your to do list and highlight the actions that are of   greatest value to yourself and those around you.  Prioritizing can be key when you have too much to do and only so much focus and brain power for each day. When we try to “do-it-all”,  80% of what we do is half-baked, sloppy and uninspired.  When we work outside of our strengths,  we experience fatigue and disengagement.

We received a challenge this week at the Sunday morning sermon.  We were given a deck of cards to inspire us to try new things to bring more balance to our lives.  One of the suggestions was to look at your to-do list and eliminate one thing and add a playful activity instead.

FIND THE FUN!!!

  • Play a game with one of your activities today.  Compete with yourself, a family member or co-worker and plan a reward for accomplishing a task.
  • Get your lunch take-out and go to a park to eat, walk, skip, dance and relax.  Check out the Dance/walk video from Soul Pancake
  • Look for something that is humorous  (not at the expense of others), a great cartoon or joke and share it with friends, family and co-workers.
  • Put on “play clothes” as soon as you get home from work today so you can shift your mood more quickly.
  • Check out the Institute of Play  for more ideas about how kids (and adults)  can learn from play!

What can you plan to do today that will feel like play!

Ok men, it’s Monday, start pre-paving the way for a great weekend with your beloved NOW!

This past Sunday I attended a church that was kicking off their annual spiritual growth campaign called “Stronger”.  This first week is about balancing  our lives by making sure that we are including enough play!!!!

Steven Covey, in his book The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, writes this:

Habit 7 is about taking time to sharpen the saw.  It surrounds the other habits on the Seven Habits paradigm because it is the habit that makes all the others possible.  …It’s renewing the four dimensions of your nature – physical, spiritual, mental and social/emotional.

So how does taking time to “sharpen the saw”  affect the relationship I have with the love of my life?  You might think that spending quality time with your beloved over the weekend is enough.  You had fun,  you enjoyed some music,  a good meal and the company of friends but now you are at work.  You don’t have time or room in your brain to start thinking about how to make next weekend great, or the weekend after that or the next year, or the next ten years!

The truth is  you can’t afford not to!

The pastor shared with us this view,

The opposite of play is depression.

Wow, that hit hard,  we all thought the opposite of play was work!

When it comes to depression,  nothing causes a woman to go into a state of depression quicker than feeling insecure about how the man in her life feels about her.  She may know intellectually that he loves her but she doesn’t feel loved.  If she has to go an entire work week without feeling loved,  when they can come together as a couple  for quality time on the weekend,  she is too drained to be receptive.

What is the solution?    Jeff Feldhahn, co-author of For Men Only – a straightforward guide to the inner lives of women, writes this,

So how do you and I address the fact that our wife carries around this fundamental insecurity about our love?  Based on all the research, there are two key solutions:

  1. In the face of insecurity, reassure her.
  2. Even after you’ve caught her, continue to pursue her.

How can you daily, pave the way of reassurance?  How can you persistently pursue her during the week so that she is emotionally energized for your time together on the weekend ? Think of these little acts of reassurance and attention as important drops of emotional vitamins and minerals that only you,  yes, only you, can provide.  (There is job security for you! )

If this is the woman you share the highest level of intimacy with,  by all means pave the way with actions of equal value.  For example; You use the phone,  email, text and social media for everyone that you don’t have the opportunity to see or don’t want to actually be in the same room with.  Why would you communicate with your beloved through these same channels?

Make it special.  Make it real.  Make it sincere.  Make it playful and fun!

……………………………………………Don’t make her find it somewhere else.